A NEWLY CERTIFICATED INST PLT GOT CONFUSED IN MAKING A VOR APCH.

Narrative

I WAS FLYING FROM SANTA ROSA; (STS) TO LINCOLN; (051) ON AN IFR FLT PLAN IN VFR CONDITIONS. IT WAS ONLY THE SECOND TIME I FILED AN IFR FLT PLAN SINCE I RECEIVED MY INST RATING. I WAS APCHING MARYSVILLE VOR (MYV) FROM YUBBA INTXN AND HAD BEEN CLRED FOR THE VOR RWY 15 APCH TO LINCOLN. I DECIDED TO TAKE ONE MORE LOOK AT THE APCH CHART TO DOUBLE CHK MY FINAL HDG; TIME AN ALT. WHEN I LOOKED AT THE CHART; I MISTOOK THE HOLDING PATTERN FOR THE MISSED APCH FOR A PROC TURN. THE COCKPIT LIGHTING WASN'T ADJUSTED VERY WELL. I KNEW INSIDE THAT I SHOULD TURN INBOUND; BUT KEPT PICTURING THE HOLDING PATTERN PROC TURN IN MY MIND. I DECIDED THE SAFEST THING WOULD BE TO START A TURN AND FLY OVER THE HOLDING PATTERN. THE CTLR CALLED AND ASKED WHAT I WAS DOING. AS I SAID THE WORDS 'PROCEDURE TURN' I REALIZED MY MISTAKE. I WANTED TO EXPLAIN THIS TO THE CTLR; BUT INSTEAD I JUST ASKED WHAT I COULD DO TO CORRECT THE SIT. I IMMEDIATELY TURNED BACK TO THE VOR AND CONTINUED THE APCH WITHOUT FURTHER INCIDENT. I SHOULD NOT HAVE WAITED UNTIL I WAS SO CLOSE TO THE VOR TO REVIEW THE APCH CHART. ONCE I STARTED THE HOLD AT THE VOR; I SHOULD HAVE IMMEDIATELY ADVISED THE CTLR. WHEN THE CTLR ASKED ME WHAT WAS HAPPENING; I SHOULD HAVE CONFESSED IMMEDIATELY AND NOT BEEN SO AFRAID TO TAKE UP TIME ON THE FREQ. IT WAS LATE IN THE EVENING. I DID NOT FEEL REALLY COMFORTABLE TALKING TO THE CTLR. THE NEXT MORNING; I SCHEDULED SOME GND INSTRUCTION WITH MY FLT INSTRUCTOR. WE DISCUSSED ALL ASPECTS OF THE FLT AND ADDRESSED SEVERAL 'WHAT IF' SCENARIOS. IT IS AMAZING HOW MUCH I LEARNED FROM THIS EXPERIENCE. ON THE RETURN FLT I FELT LIKE A MORE COMPETENT PLT. I FEEL THAT NEWLY RATED INST PLTS SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED TO REVIEW THEIR FIRST FLTS WITH AN INSTRUCTOR. WHENEVER A QUESTION ARISES; QUERY ATC IMMEDIATELY AS IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU KNOW WHAT THEY EXPECT AND THAT THEY KNOW WHAT YOU INTEND TO DO.