WHILE ON APCH TO RWY 31R AT JFK; A COMMUTER FLC RECEIVED A CLRNC TO MAINTAIN A SPD THAT DID NOT ALLOW THEM TO REMAIN CLR OF THE PRECEDING B767'S WAKE TURB. THE FLC REDUCED SPD; BUT WERE THEN REPRIMANDED FOR SLOWING AND CAUSING A PROB WITH THE B747 TFC FOLLOWING THEM. THE FLC POINTS TO CTLR PRESSURE AND LACK OF SUFFICIENT SPACING AS THE CAUSE OF THE PROB.

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WHILE DOING AN APCH INTO JFK; APCH VECTORED US IN BEHIND AN ACR B767 AT A DISTANCE OF 4 DME. APCH TURNED US OVER TO TWR AT APPROX 10 DME. TWR TOLD US 'CAUTION WAKE TURB; MAINTAIN 160 KTS TO THE MARKER; CLRED TO LAND RWY 31R.' THE LOM AT JFK IS 5.2 DME FROM THE FIELD. WE WERE CATCHING UP TO THE B767; SO WE SLOWED TO 150 KTS APPROX 2 MI OUTSIDE THE MARKER; THEN WE SLOWED TO 140 KTS AT THE LOM AND HELD 140 KTS TO 200 FT AGL. TWR REPRIMANDED US FOR SLOWING OUTSIDE THE MARKER. AT THE TIME WE WERE DOING THE APCH; THERE WAS A FOREIGN B747 BEHIND US ON APCH TO RWY 31R AS WELL. TWR TOLD THE B747 TO SLOW TO FINAL APCH SPD. WE LANDED AND EXPEDITED CLR OF THE RWY. THE FOREIGN B747 LANDED WITHOUT INCIDENT. WHEN TWR TOLD US 'CAUTION WAKE TURB;' AND WE NOTICED WE WERE OVERTAKING THE B767; WE TOOK IT UPON OURSELVES TO SLOW. BUT JUDGING FROM THE REACTION OF THE TWR CTLR; WE SHOULDN'T HAVE. IT SEEMS THAT ON A DAILY BASIS WE ARE BEING VECTORED IN BEHIND SOME HVY (WELL WITHIN THE 5 MI LIMIT THAT WE ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE). WE'RE ALSO GIVING TKOF CLRNCS BEFORE THE HVY IS 5 MI AWAY OR 2 MINS HAS PASSED. THE MOST SERIOUS OFFENDERS ARE JFK; EWR; AND PHL. CTLRS ARE NOT FOLLOWING THE PROPER SPACING REQUIREMENTS AS OFTEN AS THEY SHOULD.