ACR PLT IN IMC CONDITIONS TOOK EVASIVE ACTION TO AVOID MLG.

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FLYING CRANBURY DEP SID OF EWR WITH KENTON TRANSITION OVER RICHMOND THEN SBND. JUST GIVEN LEVEL-OFF AT 6000' AND HANDED TO NY SW DEP CTL. WE WERE ON A 220 DEG HDG ASSIGNED TO INTERCEPT THE COLTS NECK 350 DEG R TO COLTS NECK (SEE SID). WHEN RADIAL BECAME 'ALIVE' AND INTERCEPT TURN INITIATED; DEP CTL ISSUED A LEFT TURN TO 120 DEGS FOR VECTOR. THERE WAS SOME HINT OF IMMEDIACY IN THIS TURN REQUEST; HOWEVER NO WORDS LIKE 'IMMEDIATE' OR 'NOW' WERE USED. F/O BEGAN A GRADUAL LEFT TURN TO THE REQUESTED 120 DEG HDG. WE WERE IN SNOW WITH ENG ANTI-ICE ON; AND ONLY OUR NAV AND ROTATING BEACON LIGHTS ON AS WE WERE NOT USING LNDG LIGHTS FOR COLLISION AVOIDANCE AS IS PROC BELOW 18000'; AS WE WOULD HAVE BEEN BLINDED BY THE GLARE. WHILE IN THE LEFT TURN (AND IN A 30 DEG BANK); I NOTICED THAT THE F/O WAS DSNDING THROUGH 5900' AT ABOUT 300-500 FPM AND I CALLED IT TO HIS ATTN TO HANG ONTO OUR ASSIGNED 6000'. AT THE VERY INSTANT I LOOKED AT HIM WITH THIS ADVISORY; I LOOKED OUT HIS RIGHT SIDE WINDOW AND (ALONG WITH HIM) SAW WHAT APPEARED TO BE AN MLG FILL UP HIS WINDOW. HE HAD ALREADY SEEN IT AND WAS INITIATING A MANEUVER TO AVOID COLLISION. THE TFC WAS LEVEL AT WHAT WE 3 AGREED WAS OUR ALT; AND ONLY THE 30 DEG BANK THAT WE WERE ALREADY IN (GOING THROUGH 180 DEGS TOWARD THE 120 DEG HDG ASSIGNED) SAVED US FROM COLLIDING WITH THE CONFLICTING TFC. THE F/O'S ALT DEVIATION TO MAYBE 5800' WAS TOO LITTLE TOO LATE FOR VERT SEP. THE HDG CHANGE PROVIDED WHAT WAS REQUIRED TO AVOID COLLISION AND THAT WAS INITIATED BY DEP CTL. AS THE PIC; I ASKED THE CTLR ABOUT THE TFC THAT WE HAD JUST PASSED AND SHE NOTED CASUALLY THAT IT WAS AN ARR TO LGA ON THAT STAR RTE AND AT 7000'. NO WAY. AS IT WAS SNOWING HEAVILY AT 6000'; THE CONFLICTING TFC LOOMED OUT OF THE OVCST; PASSED US LIKE 2 SHIPS IN THE NIGHT; THEN DISAPPEARED JUST AS QUICKLY. I DO BELIEVE THAT EVERYONE ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE MLG GOT A VERY GOOD VIEW OF US; HOWEVER. NO FURTHER MENTION WAS MADE OF THE INCIDENT ON THE FREQ; NOR HAVE I OR WILL I FILE A NEAR MISS RPT. THESE ATC-RELATED IRREGULARITIES ARE OCCURRING WITH ME NOW (ESPECIALLY IN THE CONGESTED NE CORRIDOR) WITH EVER-INCREASING REGULARITY. IT IS MY FEELING THAT SOMETHING IS DRASTICALLY WRONG WITH THE SYS AND IT NEEDS IMMEDIATE ATTN; OR THERE IS BOUND TO BE A TRAGEDY. MY ADVICE TO PLTS WHO FLY THIS ARE (AND I PRACTICE IT TO THE LETTER) IS EXTRA; EXTRA VIGILANCE; PAYING PARTICULAR ATTN TO CLRNCS; READING BACK ALL ALTS; HDGS AND RTES WITH THE FLT'S CALL SIGN PRONOUNCED SLOWLY AND DELIBERATELY; AND STAYING OUTSIDE THE COCKPIT (ALL 3 PLTS). I CONTINUALLY ASK WHAT SPD THEY WANT; NO DIRECTS AND GO 'BACK TO BASICS' TO HELP THEM THROUGH WHATEVER STRAIN THEY ARE EXPERIENCING. I'D LIKE TO THINK IT HELPS. CALLBACK CONVERSATION WITH RPTR REVEALED THE FOLLOWING: CAPT VERY DISTURBED BY FREQ OF SUCH INCIDENTS IN E COAST AREA. ESPECIALLY QUESTIONS SIDS WITH NUMEROUS FREQ CHANGES ('LIGHTNING BOLTS') WHICH FORCE MORE EYES INSIDE INSTEAD OF OUTSIDE IN THESE HIGH DENSITY AREAS. ANY WAY TO SIMPLIFY?????