FO RPT ON FAILURE OF ACR PIC TO FOLLOW ATC REQUEST FOR SPD INCREASE ON ARR TFC. SPD DEV.

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ATC FACILITY: SOCAL. LOCATION: 20-30 MI E OF KAYOH ON E- SIDE ARR; CAPT FLYING AT 220 KTS. ATC ASKED US TO INCREASE TO 250 KTS. I READ BACK CLRNC. CAPT KEPT 220 KTS. ATC ASKED IF WE WERE INCREASING. THINKING WE WOULD; I SAID INCREASING THROUGH 220 KTS. CAPT MAINTAINED 220 KTS. ATC'S 3RD CALL; CAPT SAID HE'D HAVE TO SLOW AT KAYOH. ATC SAID FOR NOW NEED 250 KTS. CAPT STAYED AT 220 KTS. ATC ASKED SPD. CAPT SAID SAY 240 KTS; KEPT 220 KTS. ATC SAID ACFT BACK AT 210 KTS; 10 KTS LESS GND SPD. OBVIOUSLY ANGRY HE ADVISED US OF OUR OBLIGATION TO COMPLY WITH CLRNC. ACFT BEHIND US TURNED TO 180 DEGS AND 260 KTS FOR SPACE. NEXT FREQ 121.3 CLRED ILS RWY 19R. INSTEAD OF FOLLOWING LNAV COMMAND BARS; ARMED LOC AT LOC ALIVE; WENT THROUGH LOC; ASSIGNED HDG 165 TO REINTERCEPT LOC. WHOLE THING ILLEGAL. I DO NOT LIKE BEING UNNECESSARILY EXPOSED TO POSSIBLE FAA VIOLATION; NOR DO I APPRECIATE BEING EXPECTED TO BEND THE TRUTH. REASON CAPT GAVE FOR MAINTAINING 220 KTS WAS THAT ATC NEEDED TO LEARN NOT TO FLY OUR AIRPLANES FOR US.