AN ACR B757 FLC RECEIVED A CHANGE OF RWYS AS THEY APCHED THE OM. DUE TO A MIXUP IN THE ILS FREQ THEY ENDED UP MAKING A GAR.

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AFTER INTERCEPTING BOTH COURSE AND GS TO RWY 4R (WE HAD PREVIOUSLY BEEN CLRED FOR THE APCH TO RWY 4R); WE WERE TOLD BY APCH TO SWITCH TO RWY 4L AND CONTACT TWR. I RELUCTANTLY ACCEPTED THE CHANGE; TURNED OFF THE AUTOPLT AND FLT DIRECTORS AND CHANGED TO THE NEW ILS FREQ AS THE CAPT (PNF) MADE THE NEW RADIO CALL TO TWR. I THEN ASKED HIM TO IDENT THE NEW ILS FREQ. HE TURNED OVER HIS APCH PLATE AND ASSUMED IT WAS RWY 4L; SET IN THE DEPICTED FREQ AND IDENTED IT. HIS SWITCHING OF THE FREQ REMOVED THE CORRECT FREQ I HAD ALREADY SET; AND REINSERTED THE PREVIOUS FREQ FOR RWY 4R. I CTRED UP ON THE ILS CDI AND NOTICED A MAP SHIFT ON MY FMS DISPLAY TO THE R OF RWY 4L. BEFORE WE COULD ISOLATE THE SOURCE OF THE DISCREPANCY; TWR TOLD US WE APPEARED TO BE LINED UP ON RWY 4R AND GAVE US MISSED APCH INSTRUCTIONS. SUMMARY: APCH CTL AT NYC GIVES WAY TOO MANY RWY CHANGES IN BOTH VMC AND IMC. THEY SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO MAKE CHANGES BELOW 2000 FT AND INSIDE 5 MI AND AIR CREWS SHOULD BE MORE WILLING TO REFUSE SUCH A CLRNC. I HAVE TWICE BEFORE BEEN GIVEN 3 AND 5 RWY CHANGES IN THE LAST 3-5 MINS OF FLT; BOTH VMC AND IMC. ALSO; ATC INSTRUCTIONS SHOULD NEVER INCLUDE HDGS; FREQS; FOR BOTH ILS AND TWR; AND CLRNCS ALL IN ONE BREATH. INFO OVERLOAD AT A CRITICAL TIME.