A B757-200 FLC ALMOST LOSES SEPARATION FROM AN OPPOSITE DIRECTION BIZJET AT THEIR ALT WHILE IN CTL WITH N90; NY.

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LOCATION: 35 MI NE EWR. WHILE BEING VECTORED FOR APCH ILS RWY 22L EWR AT 4000 FT; N90 APCH BEGAN AN ANIMATED DISCUSSION WITH BIZJET WHO HAD NOT COMPLIED WITH A CLRNC. AT THE SAME TIME WE RECEIVED A TCASII TA AT 12 O'CLOCK POS; OPPOSITE DIRECTION; 5 MI; SAME ALT. AFTER STUDYING SIT FOR APPROX 10 SECONDS AND BECAUSE ATC FREQ WAS STILL TIED UP; FO (PF) INITIATED A L TURN TO AVOID AN IMPENDING CONFLICT. WHEN ABLE WE INFORMED ATC WHO THANKED US FOR THE TIMELY TURN; STATING THAT IT WAS THE CORRECT THING TO HAVE DONE UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES. WE WERE THEN VECTORED BACK IN FOR THE APCH. UPON ARR EWR; WE CALLED TRACON TO DISCUSS POSSIBLE LOSS OF SEPARATION. ATC HAD CPA OF 3 MI. WE CALLED IT 2.5 MI. ATC EXPLAINED THEIR REDUCED SEPARATION PARAMETERS UNDER APCH VECTORING AND WITH DIVERGING COURSES. I ACCEPTED HIS EXPLANATION AND AGREED NOT TO FILE AN NMAC RPT. THIS IS BEING SUBMITTED AS AN ASAP FOR RECORD PURPOSES AND IN ORDER TO HIGHLIGHT A COMS PROB IN THIS ENVIRONMENT. WE HAD WX AND HIGH DENSITY COMS. THE BIZJET HAD EXECUTED A PORTION OF HIS CLRNC (A DSCNT TO OUR ALT); BUT NOT EXECUTED A TURN BECAUSE HE WAS NOT SURE OF THE TURN CLRNC. WHILE WAITING TO GET BACK ON THE FREQ AND CONFIRM; TFC CONFLICT DEVELOPED WITH US. THAT WAS THE FIRST COM PROB. SECONDLY; WE RECEIVED A TA AND NOT BEING ABLE TO GET ON THE FREQ; AND NOT KNOWING WHETHER BIZJET HAD TCASII; WE ACTED TO ASSURE SEPARATION BY COMMENCING A TURN. THIS WAS THE SECOND INSTANCE OF EITHER ACTION OR NON ACTION DUE TO CONGESTED FREQ. ATC AGREED WITH AND APPRECIATED OUR ACTION. THIS RPT DOCUMENTS 2 PROBS WITH A CONGESTED ATC FREQ WHICH NEARLY RESULTED IN LOSS OF SEPARATION.