AN A320 LNDG IN ONT EXPRESSED CONCERN REGARDING ATC INSTRUCTIONS WHILE ON SHORT FINAL WITH MIN VISIBILITY AND SUBSEQUENT PHONE CONVERSATION (S) WITH TWR CTLR.

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WE WERE FLYING ACFT X FROM DEN TO ONT ON DEC/TUE/04. AFTER FLYING THE ZIGGY 3 ARR IN IFR CONDITIONS WITH MODERATE TO HEAVY PRECIPITATION AND LIGHT ICING; WE WERE HANDED OFF TO ONT TWR. I CALLED THE ONT TWR WHEN WE WERE JUST INSIDE OF THE FINAL APCH FAX 'NAROD.' THE CAPT WAS THE PLT FLYING. AT THAT TIME WE COULD JUST BARELY SEE THE RWY DUE TO HEAVY RAIN. THE TWR CTLR INSTRUCTED US TO SIDESTEP TO RWY 8R. I SAID TO THE CAPT; 'I DON'T KNOW; WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO.' HE SAID; 'NO; LET'S STAY WITH RWY 8L.' I TOLD THE TWR CTLR WE WERE UNABLE TO SIDESTEP. THE TWR CTLR SAID; 'MAKE SOME WIDE S-TURNS; NO; MAKE A L 360.' WE LOOKED TO THE L AND SAW NOTHING BUT A BLACK HOLE DUE TO LOW CLOUDS OBSCURING THE MOUNTAINS. AGAIN; I TOLD THE TWR CTLR 'UNABLE.' WHEN WE GOT DOWN LOWER; THE CAPT SAID; 'I CAN SEE IT GOOD ENOUGH NOW.' I TOLD THE TWR CTLR; 'WE CAN SEE THE RWY GOOD ENOUGH TO SIDESTEP NOW.' HE CLRED US TO LAND ON RWY 8R. WE LANDED WITHOUT INCIDENT. AS SOON AS WE TOOK THE SIDESTEP; THE TWR CTLR CLRED OTHER ACFT Y FOR TKOF ON RWY 8L. WHEN WE LANDED WE ASKED WHY HE HAD ASKED US TO DO A 360 ON FINAL JUST TO LET SOMEONE ELSE TKOF? THE TWR CTLR SAID THAT IT WAS HIS DISCRETION AND THAT HE COULD DO WHATEVER HE WANTED. I ASKED FOR THE TWR PHONE NUMBER AND HE GAVE IT TO ME AND HE SAID THAT HE EXPECTED A CALL. AFTER WE SHUT DOWN I CALLED THE TWR TO EXPRESS MY DISMAY FOR WHAT HE TRIED TO DO TO US. I COULD NOT GET A WORD OUT. THE FIRST THING HE SAID TO ME WAS (THIS IS AN EXACT QUOTE); 'WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU; YOU @$&*%#^ *&$%#$*!' HE SAID SOMETHING TO THE EFFECT THAT; 'YOU'LL DO WHAT I TELL YOU TO DO.' HE THEN ASKED FOR MY NAME AND I SAID; 'IF YOU WANT MY NAME CALL THE COMPANY.' HE THEN CALLED ME A '@$&*%#^ *&$%#$*!' SEVERAL MORE TIMES. THIS PERSON WAS NOT ABLE TO CARRY ON A RATIONAL CONVERSATION SO I HUNG UP THE PHONE; SAID GOODBYE TO THE PAX AND WENT HOME. CALLBACK CONVERSATION WITH RPTR REVEALED THE FOLLOWING INFO: THE RPTR WAS MORE CONCERNED REGARDING THE ATC ISSUED TURN GIVEN THE WX CONDITIONS THAN HE WAS ABOUT THE CTLR'S COMMENTS AND ATTITUDE. THE RPTR INDICATED THE COMPANY HAD CONTACTED THE FACILITY AND DISCUSSED THE INCIDENT WITH MANAGEMENT PERSONNEL.